1. |
Steady
03:37
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Held a candle to the canvas, watched it all go up
Nearly took to the houses, smoke to the skies above
I'm still coughing
Black lungs burning from the rented homes
The chaos left inside
Ran away from the moral debt
Chest full of regret, I finally said
Enough
Steady, nervous hands, again
Steady, nervous hands, again
Felt at ease with the solitude at first
Sitting in the corner of a dim lit room
That smells like bad fast food
The only thing between me and apathy
Has always been a cup of caffeine
A selfish wish for things I might not need
Should I keep stacking goals ahead like some sad litmus test for happiness?
No
Show me how to feel content
Can't wake up to ceilings spinning
Again, again, again, again
Steady, nervous hands, again
Steady, nervous hands, again
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2. |
Mess of My Head
03:19
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I'm bagging memories
On the side of my house with the fall leaves
I saw the change in everything
Cold brought the rusted trees
Spent more time thinking about their endings than I ever do beginnings
I've been stuck in these questions like snowbanks
Made a mess of my head but we're better off awake
I've been stuck in these questions like snowbanks
Made a mess of my head but we're better off awake
We're better off awake
It's a bag full of cables that just didn't feel the same
My feet on this stage, in this same place start to atrophy
I got distant, dismissive
Caught somewhere in between
Presence and absence of meaning
Felt my feet on the chain link slipping
Felt the fear of falling overwhelm a love of climbing
I've been stuck in these questions like snowbanks
Made a mess of my head but we're better off awake
I've been stuck in these questions like snowbanks
Made a mess of my head but we're better off awake
Better off awake
Oh, I get caught up in all of this and I'm sorry
I want to see you happy
Wherever you plant your feet
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3. |
Circadian
03:32
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Uncertainty
Dwelling on my mind, this fever dream
It's you and me and everything
Complacency
Nothing here to see, just go back to sleep
Generation left wandering
We're working backwards hanging on the branches
Of our fading dreams
You'll take your share or see it burnt to ashes
There's more to this, it seems
Lost in everything
Newsprint circling
Oh, caught between the fabric of the lies and discontent
Oh, watch it fall apart in half time
Oh, caught between the promise of the rust and could have been
Oh, falling behind
District lines turned battlegrounds
Watch the bullshit falling from your mouth
Fickle fragile egos
Plastic skin in sheep's clothes
Stake your claim while there's something left to brag about
I can say anything I want to
And you'll want more
There's always more
What you act out is what you'll be
Act a fool, you'll see
What we act out is what we'll be
But everyone is sleeping
I sleep, I dream
I make things up that you would never say
And I sing them out to you sweetly
Caught you praying to prophets on a glowing screen
Don't tell your friends you lack that Christian conviction
Wear down the middleman with constant distractions
There's nothing left, you've taken everything you can
Everything
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4. |
Postcards
03:16
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I got lost again
Treading water with the best of them
Hands couldn't tie up loose ends
I guess it's been months now
Stretching phone calls out
The distance feels tangible
It's more than just syllables
Caught between a hard place and terminal gates
I felt the doubt start to take shape
I can't just sit and watch the sunset
Sit and watch the mountains and hope they'll say something
An offering tell me how to fight this
Show me why I'm like this
Why do I hide away
It's over and it's done now
We can't ever buy back the time we spent bartering sentiment
I know I was the wedge that pushed these tectonic plates apart
Sit and watch the sunset
Sit and watch the mountains and hope they'll say something
An offering tell me how to fight this
Show me why I'm like this
Why do I hide away
You were the smoke signals I never wanted to see
The courage to cross state lines, all I found was apathy
I can't just sit and watch the sunset
Sit and watch the mountains and hope they'll say something
An offering tell me how to fight this
Show me why I'm like this
Why do I hide away
I saw the state lines turn to fault lines right in front of me
In front of me
The state lines turn to fault lines
I saw the state lines turn to fault lines right in front of me
In front of me
The state lines turn to fault lines
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5. |
Swell
02:13
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I am fickle
I am fragile
I am burning in the sun
Colorado head, north Texas blood
You look different than the time we met
Paler skin, lost the spark to your complexion
Damn the drink that put the matching bracelets on our skin
I can feel it circling
I can feel it circling
Blood and bones, gnashing teeth
Always feel it circling
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6. |
Waves
04:10
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So, this is how we choose to spend our time
Talking shit
On everyone who doesn't fit
Requirements, a tired list
I thought it'd never come to this
Either way I think it's time I cop that Irish exit
A silver tongue tarnished
Another bar tab spent wishing
I spent my paycheck on something of substance
You keep your ego and I'll find another way out
Of a sick and jaded frame of mind
No time left to borrow
No semblance of healthy self doubt
Left to curb your appetite
Poking holes in sails as a pastime
Measure breaths in a chorus of recycled lines
It shook the walls, the way you threw it in my face
The vitriol misplaced best left behind your teeth
It's not what this city needs
Like the pint glasses look less inviting when they're empty
(I still feel empty)
You keep your ego and I'll find another way out
Of a sick and jaded frame of mind
No time left to borrow
No semblance of healthy self doubt
Left to curb your appetite
It comes in waves
It comes in waves
It comes in ways I can't relate
It comes in waves
It comes in waves
It comes in ways I can't explain
Yeah I thought I got older
I thought that my shoulders
Could carry all your bullshit
But there's more to life than the plastic skin you're in
I'm fucking going
Yeah I thought I got older
I thought that my shoulders
Could carry all your bullshit
And the plastic skin you're in
I'm fucking going
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7. |
Greyhound
03:34
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Chasing my tail
The bluest screens and paper trails
Tarot cards coming up empty
Searching for meaning obscured by the permanent rose tinted glasses
It's about whoever's voice is the loudest
A constant comparison
What good is the currency
Devoid of all meaning
I'd be better off sleeping and dreaming
What good is all of the smiling if there's something you're hiding
Stoically, safe away from everything
Are we better off
Are you better off
Am I better off
Target on my chest
This shit, it cuts me to the bone
Felt like too many eyes all at once
Pry the misery from all of us
What masochist could say enough
What good is the currency
Devoid of all meaning
I'd be better off sleeping and dreaming
What good is all of the smiling if there's something you're hiding
Stoically, safe away from everything
What good is the currency
Devoid of all meaning
I'd be better off sleeping and dreaming
What good is all of the smiling if there's something you're hiding
Stoically, safe away from everything
It's about whoever's voice is the loudest
It's about whoever's voice is the loudest
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8. |
Paper Mache
04:16
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Guess I've been fraying at the edges
More often than I care to admit
All the vices, the wasted nights spent
Wasting time
And I've been making a list
Of all the things I know I've missed
Still I'm striving for nothing tonight
Locked inside
And I don't know why
But the walls of this rut are steep
And your words cut deep
It could be worse, couldn't it
Work it all out, could it be anything that I had in my head
You've been pointing out my progress
I know I have a tendency to forget
All the steps I've made in my life
Since I was spending most nights drinking alone
Yeah, I fucked up
I was caught up
In a caustic flame, I had to get away I'm paper mache
It could be worse, couldn't it
Work it all out, could it be anything that I had in my head
But the truth is, it's irrelevant
The steps we missed
The stacks of could have been's
They sit in the shadows of our progress
It's progress
It could be worse, couldn't it
Work it all out, could it be anything that I had in my head
But the truth is, it's irrelevant
The steps we missed
The stacks of could have been's
They sit in the shadows of our -
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9. |
Laugh Lines
03:27
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Paper well wishes
Distract from the distance
With tentative optimism
Be it pins on a map or walls inside your mind
Your trepidation shows through your laugh lines
Oh, I know it's been months now
I saw the phone calls die out
Blue light turned cancerous comparisons
You pulled the corners of the canvas together
Bags packed, you left for better weather
But you've got your convictions
You built a framework on the south side with them
And I've got my excuses
But I've been working on my disposition
I found my regrets
Turned to stone in my pockets
When I waded off the shore with them
And tried to swim
I won't let them pull me down
No I won't drown in the snowmelt our time together brought to this town
I won't
Yeah I've got my convictions
I built a framework on the north side with them
And you've got hesitations
Trust me it's worth the time it takes to kill them
I want peace with the balance
Not a tangled tightrope dizzy cadence
While we sit always hoping
That the steps we take get less exhausting
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10. |
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No one ever tells you when you're older
That you'll miss the fears you had when you were younger
Instead you're scared to walk out your front door
Not sure what you were worried for
They never tell you when you're older
I miss counting cracks in the concrete
My footsteps could fracture the distance between
Old haunts, chain link, and bad dreams
No one ever tells you when you're older
That you'll miss the fears you had when you were younger
Instead you're scared to walk out your front door
Not sure what you were worried for
They never tell you when you're older
Keeping pace with a broken teenage heart
Forced to see the same people every day
Dragging memories through beer stained basements and bars
Nostalgic in the worst way
Now we self-medicate to fall asleep
Work 9-5, pay for the lives we lead
Suburban shells get stagnant while we
Turn brittle with the leaves
No one ever tells you when you're older
That you'll miss the fears you had when you were younger
Instead you're scared to walk out your front door
Not sure what you were worried for
They never tell you when you're older
As a kid I wrote letters
To myself in the future
Some kind of pagan prayer for better weather
But the truth is
Those fears that we grew up with
Never left us
The asphalt and the sprawl our inheritance
I guess we're still waiting for the clouds to lift
Trying to understand how big the world can get
Old friend, I'm proud of the steps we take
It's okay, be proud of the paper commitments we all make
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11. |
Ambivalence
01:57
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I had it all figured out
Laced up shoes, found a jacket
Turned the key, tires to pavement
To crack the frozen ground
You could've told me to fuck off
For being so damn distant
I deserved it
But you didn't
The formative years of my life
Spent sitting on a fence
Unsure of how to deal with shit
I've come to think that with most things
The meaning's what you make of it
Just pick a path and deal with it
The meaning's what you make of it
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12. |
Dissonance
02:24
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I swear I did try to fix it
Before I just burned it
Believing my bullshit was all part of the show
The world tried to force me
By building up slowly
But feeling this phony was not part of the deal
I talk all the time, I never shut my mouth
I feel good as hell, but never good enough
I talk all the time, I never shut my mouth
I feel good as hell, but never good enough
I swear I did try to fix it
Before I just burned it
Believing my bullshit was all part of the show
The world tried to force me
By building up slowly
But feeling this phony was not part of the -
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13. |
Harmony
04:36
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How do I tie this all together
Been waiting so long for better weather
But the news always proves me wrong
Tracing the fine print with my fingers till they stain
Grey
I let it color my psyche that way, yeah
And that's how it stays
At least for a little while, yeah, maybe this is the year
We buy into dishonest smiling faces
They're bragging about
A brave new world, technology
Juxtaposed with abject poverty
In a system of gladhands run by hypocrisy and greed
Oh, I'm caught in the moment
I thought it was worthless
To fix anything at all
Let it fall
Rented homes and turmoil
Oh, it came down to distance
Could call me a cynic
At least a step away from pessimism
Yeah, that's gotta be something
Stopped burning at both ends
Steadied nervous hands again
I made this, I won't break it
The mess, the balance
The framework of conviction
They were always a part of the canvas
When we planted our feet
Through the fractured concrete
Felt the regret in my chest lifting
Oh, I know that my own shit
Is so hard to balance
Without it caving in like matchsticks
Around another fucking tailspin
Oh, it felt like forgiveness
To treat myself different
It's okay to feel this dissonance
Yeah, it almost sounds like progress
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Finding Common Ground Denver, Colorado
Emo rock n roll. Denver, CO
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